my water broke

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: whats new?
You: my water broke
Stranger: you should get that looked at….
You: nah
Stranger: ok. well i hope things go well ahah
You: i’m gonna deliver the baby right here
Stranger: oh really. ahah i love how your on omegle while having your baby
You: ok now you be the doctor and help me deliver this
Stranger: ok. wait really?
You: yea
Stranger: oh i think your supost to breath
You: ok i am should i put the cigarette out first
Stranger: nahh its fine
You: ok what about my glass of scotch
Stranger: and its good to have a couple of drinks so keep it with you.
You: fuck this is painful
Stranger: oh yeah i forgot to tell you about that part. are you ok?
You: no i’m in severe pain
Stranger: oh that sucks do you want me to come over and help?
You: but i got some heroin to kill the pain
Stranger: i use that all the time it really works
You: ok good i just did
You: now what do i do
Stranger: push
You: ok but it wont go back in
Stranger: push it back in! gosh do i have to do all the work
You: i got this plunger in the bathroom should i get it
Stranger: ahahha yeahh, but dont let blood get on the floor i just got it cleaned
You: its my damn floor and theres already blood on it me and my husband just got in a fight
Stranger: i dont care clean it up after
You: he got a little pissed when i told him he wasn’t the father
You: but this plunger has shit on it
Stranger: then lick it off or something
You: ok i did
You: know i’m plunging that baby out
Stranger: is it working?
You: yes
Stranger: aww thats good?
You: yes its a girl
Stranger: yeay
You: thank you whats your name
Stranger: Meghan.
Stranger: its a ugly name but w/e
You: yea it really is but in your honor i will name her nahgem
Stranger: ahha ok thanks (:
Stranger: i’ll try and make my name prettyer for you
You: oh shit my baby came out black
Stranger: thats good