Random Jokes

Post some of the funniest and most random jokes you can think of!

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  • 4

    What do you call an Asian that gets erected?
    A Politician

  • 4

    Little Mohammed entered his classroom on the first day of school.

    "What is your name?" asked the teacher.


    "You are in America now and from now on your name will be Kevin," replied the teacher.

    Mohammed returned home after school and his mother asked: "How was your day, Mohammed?"

    "My name is not Mohammed. I'm in America and now my name is Kevin."

    "Ah, are you ashamed of your name, are you trying to dishonor your parents, your heritage, your religion? Shame on you!" - and she beat him. Then she
    called his father who also beat him.

    The next day Mohammed returned to school and when his teacher saw all the bruises, she asked, "What happened to you little Kevin"?

    "Well ma'am, shortly after becoming an American, I was attacked by two fuckin' Arabs.."

  • 3

    There was a boy who came home one day from school and he tells his dad that he had sex for the first time and that it was his teacher
    "dad" way to go son! do you want a beer, or that new bike you have been wanting?
    "son" well dad, i prefer something that i didnt have to sit on, My butt kind of hurts...

    Hilarious XD +1
    - Pharmon March 24, 2011, 5:34 pm
  • 2

    what do you call a cow with no legs?
    Ground beef
    What do u call a cow with two legs?
    lean beef
    what do u call a dog woth no legs?
    u dont it wont come
    where do u find a dog with no legs?
    wherever u left it

    did u ever see helen kellers house... neither did she
    how do u play a prank on helen keller
    rearrange the furniture
    how do u play an ever crueller prank on her
    stick a plunger in the toilet

  • 1

    A tree falls on a woman and no one is around to hear her, does she make a sound?
    The real question is, what the hell is a tree doing in the kitchen?!?!?!

  • 1

    if a man says something and there is no woman around to say anything. is he still wrong?

  • 1

    Hey guys, did you....

    No, nevermind.
    I was going to tell you a joke about my dick, but it was too long.

    I can tell you about the...

    I was just going to tell you a oke about her pussy, but you just wouldn't get it.

    Well I could tell you a joke about pussy, but it's just too deep for you
    - DubFace March 25, 2011, 3:37 am
    I could tell you a joke about your mom, but I had sex with her.
    - Trickard March 25, 2011, 3:41 am
    Well played sir. +1 for you
    - DubFace March 25, 2011, 3:59 am
    I could tell you a joke about snooki's pussy but its overused
    - ThatAsian January 30, 2012, 11:56 pm
  • 1

    I applied for a job at the mental hospital. They told me i need 24 hours experience with a retarded kid. So if you wanna hang out tomorrow, i got a box of crayons.

  • 1

    the chicago cubs

  • 1

    Q: What's green and sings?
    A: Elvis Parsley

    Q: What's brown and sticky?
    A: A stick

    • TexBex
    • January 31, 2012, 11:50 am
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