How to annoy people

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

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  • 4

    really dude? just stop. you are so fucking annoying

  • 3

    Hahahahahaha.....apparently you forgot #33. Downrate people and post "spam" repeatedly. Not that I condone what Downrateme does but he seems to be successful at annoying people.

    yeah. i love how downrateme is only rank 588 where as joshffuler is rank 14677
    - zooboy338 January 19, 2011, 9:27 am
    1.) Who the fuck is joshfuller?
    2.) Why the fuck would I care what rank he is?
    3.) You are a fag for keeping track of other men.
    - yourmomisawhore January 19, 2011, 10:19 am
    Actually I don't keep track I just scrolled down a little seeing how they both posted on this. And my point was that Josh was saying that he hates the guy. I guess you weren't with us for that whole joshffuller v.s. downrateme situation. And no need to get so hostile. And by the way I am completely straight, but I take offense to the "fag" comment for I have many gay friends and "fag" is not the proper term.
    - zooboy338 January 21, 2011, 6:22 pm
  • 2

    yeah i wish there was a way to block people

  • 1

    U copied off of some other kids post.

    May you please specify, because I just searched for "how to annoy people" and only the following had anything in common with my list and that one was created 10 months ago, whereas my list was made a year ago.
    - zooboy338 January 18, 2011, 3:00 pm
    Hmm... guess it was. srry dude!
    - mariofox03 January 19, 2011, 4:19 am
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