Hello? Testing 1,2,5!

No descriptions anymore? Fine Ember will write it here.- You know the drill Ember writes an hour on whatever enters her brain, then she posts the result.-

Ahem, glad you could join Ember and her wall of text. Why a wall of text because Ember does not have the time to dive through years worth of posts to make sure ther are no reposts. So here it is two years later Ember what the fuck (3) Yes it's different, it's because of reasons.

No one was comenting on anything so Ember wrote this. There was only one update in the hour (0300-0400) that it took to write this. (Where is everyone?) If you don't want to read a wall of I don't even know what this is anymore? A calmed down what the fuck? It's not on Embers level, brains should explode. But still.

If do not want read, take this picture with you. It is a cat, cat's are nice.
I like cats.

Cat loves the Potato


You know what? I’ll tell you what! Don’t even worry about what it is I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you all! I don’t know actually I’m bored this is a bad idea. I am a bad person with a bad idea. You’ve changed CHANGED I SAY! But that’s not why this is a bad idea. I have nothing to say other then this but Ember is typing anyway because fuck you fuck you I say. Not really I love you. Not really only a little depending on who you are. If you are you and not not you as you are being now unless you are one of the ones I like in that case I love you. One thing has been bothering Ember for a while now. You know that thing that hot water freezes faster than cold. Ebola or something of that nature. It’s not Ebola, for some reason Ebola makes me think of feces. I don’t know why. This was a mistake, everything was a mistake I can’t do this anymore I’ve changed, I can’t ramble on like this I’m better at structure now. Or rather structured chaos and stupidity. A lot like this only less rambley. I used to love to ramble I’m just not that good at it anymore I can’t even write songs! SONGS! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONGSS! Here look, just look!
I once was a lion
A very good lion
I fucked people up
Then I fucked bitches

I once was a cat
A very scary cat
I took a nap
Then I fucked bitches

I once was a human
A very frightened human
I hid alone
Then I fucked bitches

Once I was a lion and a cat and a human
I was good I was scary I was frightened
I fucked people up I took a nap then I hid alone
Then I fucked bitches

Then I killed the bitches
Then I gave them stickers
Then I dressed them up
They live in the basement

I ate two apples
Then I fucked bitches
Then I didn’t eat a pickle
Fuck pickles, not literally

I ate two more apples
Then I was a lion
I hated apples
I fucked apples up

I ate another apple
Then I was a cat
I hated apples
I took a nap

Then I was a human
I ate another apple
Then I was a cat
I hid and took a nap

Then I ate three apples
Then I was a bird
I flew away
I fucked bitches
I took a nap
I hid alone
Fuck apples

See see! What the fuck was that, it wasn’t planed. Of course it wasn’t planed! Ember doesn’t plan songs she just throws them up. But this came out, this wasn’t light hearted and weird with undertones of violence and humor. This was just. I don’t know, what’s the word I’m looking for?
I don’t know any more I do like apples though. They are so good. It’s to bad I can’t stand eating them though, apples are gross. I do like lions and cats and birds though. Mostly cats, mostly cats but other animals are good though. I hate fish. They are not good fuck fish. Ember hates fish. If a fish was here right now I’d tell that fish “Listen here fish and listen real good. I’m only going to say this once so shut up and listed. Your daddy doesn’t like you your mommy doesn’t like you. All your friends? They don’t like you either. But you know what? YOU KNOW WHAT! Ember doesn’t like you, Ember hates you. You are ugly and stupid and no one loves you. You killed everything important and loved in this world like hopes and dreams and bacon and rainbows and rainbow bacon made out of hopes and dreams of rainbows and bacon being made of hopes and dreams. No one will ever love you. You will beg me for death. But, it will not be granted, you do not deserve death it is too good for you. Much too good.”
I would then slam the door shut and go do something more fun then talking to a fish. Talking to fish is stupid if I could talk to fish I would tell them everything, they would be my friend and I would be theirs we would laugh and cry together. The fish would be my support system and all would be okay. I would not talk to myself at 0330 while eating a pop tart while pacing around the giant table made of more tables. I would go and talk to my fish friends and I would tell them my worries and I would go to sleep for the next few hours soundly. I would be ready for the next work day with my shield and beating stick.
I’m kidding about the shield, defense is for the weak. De fence, D fence. I like to attack things openly without worrying about avoiding injury fuck you shield FUCK YOU SHIELD! I hate you and you design it’s all shield shaped like you’re afraid. What are you afraid of? Me, the world, zoos?
Zoos are prisons for animals I would be happy in a zoo. Only if my cage was sound proof, only one way though. That way Ember wouldn’t have to listen to them but they would be forced to listen to her. I would verbally abuse them all until they cried or killed themselves. Their bodies would pile up eventually spilling into Embers cage. In time enough would fall for stairs. Or a castle. I would build a castle made out of the fallen. The fat boy with the deflated balloon will be my friend. I shall name him Steve after my rock. My rocks name is Steve, he rocks.
Oh god, was that a pun? It was, it was, it was. I’m not even sorry.
But Steve is, he’s a Canadian rock you know. From Canada, that’s up. More up then up. Well not really depending on your definition of up Canada is not space. That would be silly but make sense Canadians are aliens. Have you ever noticed CanAdIaNS and AlIeNS. All the letters in aliens appeared in Canadians except for the i. Fuck i. I hate you I will never use I again. Ember doesn’t need to Ember is Ember.
Have you ever had that moment where you worried about yourself? Ember has it all the time, like now. And then, then it was a different worry. Then it was a, ha you so silly me, what are you doing now? Threatening people alongside pictures of kittens. So silly, this is why Ember likes Ember. Now Ember still likes Ember but is starting to get that feeling that Ember should take a vacation or something. How about another song………………………………….uh………

There once was a little man, some would call a midget
He preferred Greg
Greg the little man, the son of a gun
That Greg sure loved some fun

Greg, Greg, Greg, Greg
That little man, the son of a gun
And a bear
He really did love some fun

A little too much some would say
He preferred that they shut up
Greg used to have fun
He died
He died
He died
A bear killed him and ate his flesh it was his mother she was a bear not literally. She was very hairy and didn’t wear clothes and caught fish with her teeth.

SEE THAT WASN’T EVEN A SONG. It was good though admit it. Well it was nice talking to you but Embers hour of nonsense that makes sense now is up. Ember thanks you for your time and loves you depending on who you aren’t.
Whoa whoa where do you think you’re going you have four minutes left.
I don’t want to keep typing I’m tired Ember isn’t even posting this Ember wants to read or threaten people. Ember is done. NO MORE………………………………………….Ah. So nothing is coming to mind okay okay this isn’t supposed to happen there should be something other then this. There is no meaning to life 42 is a lie a vicious lie. We were lied to we need revenge. Who will lead the army to victory? Ember doesn’t want to, Ember wants to color a picture and draw. In that order! DONE one hour, huzzah!

On a side note Embers spelling is much better, admit it. Admit it!

  • ember
  • January 11, 2013, 4:51 am
You might be interested


Reply Attach
  • 2

    I admit your spelling is better. I only noticed one misspelled word.

    memes indeed1 Top Hat Explosion s500x428 278960 580 Post of Reposts s500x428 285520 580

    Progress has been made! Thanks to Embers fire breathing unicorn.

    His name is Greg, you should thank him for saving your eyes.
    - ember January 14, 2013, 3:34 pm
  • 2


    Yes she haseded! But only when she is not workededing... ED
    - ember January 14, 2013, 3:36 pm
  • 2

    welcome back kiddo.

    Ember is not a kid!

    (Ember turned 18 a few months ago. She has a job now, huzzah!)
    - ember January 14, 2013, 3:42 pm
Related Posts